Fuck, I Never Actually Learned Shit....
That's so true. Way to go, me, for managing a 99% in Physics throughout the year then getting a D+ on the final. But as much as I can't stand people who bitch about finals being too hard, teachers grading too tough, etc, I don't think this one was my fault. If I'm getting anxiety attacks while trying to do the review packet and during the actual freaking test, I don't know how I'm supposed to focus, let alone get a good grade. I'm just really freaking happy I kept my A. Mr. Mshar was probably like "WTF...?" when he entered my grade (might have even cross-checked mine with Garrett Turro's) but whatever. He's a problem solver; he can ponder over that little curveball for a while.
Huh. Seems like I only journal when I'm pissed/stressed/angry. Guess I know what my coping skills are...? At least it's better than staying up until midnight to do crunches, then going to the gym the next day and running for a hard 21/2 miles. But that fucking ice cream doesn't help at all. I don't know why I can't stay away from it... it's like a drug, I swear. And I am addicted to some shit, so I know what it feels like. It's like, take my pills, grab some ice cream... I don't know if it's me or the anorexia talking, but it feels like I gain 5 pounds every time I eat some.
But I know I'm alright.
I do miss Damon, though... I wonder if he misses me...?
After finals, Colleen and I are going to sit down and talk things out. We both have noticed the sudden, giant gap where the other used to be (I swear it's still like a damn branding iron), but neither of us will bring it up. I don't know what she's told Jenny and Emily, or if she even remembers what she said to me. I hope this all turns out okay.
- Current Location:On my ass
- Current Mood: stressed
- Current Music:Motorhead- The Game